94 Comments
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C Sail's avatar

Thank you for insisting on your full humanity. Especially in these days, centered people need to lead by demonstrating that dignity and respect are essential, the "price of admission" for engaging talent. When people start experiencing that they really do lose out through their supremacy, they will/may change. Or just lose. You drawing a courageous bright line is a powerful witness and encouragement for everyone that I truly hope gives you great reward.

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

Thank you so incredibly much. I appreciate your kind words. They give me hope.

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Julie C's avatar

It wasn’t rejection, it was protection. I’m glad you are staying your authentic true self.

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

Thank you.

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StillTrying2AgeGracefully's avatar

Black women set an example of strength and fairness, and some of the fastest wit I will ever see. Thank you to the bottom of my heart. An old ww.

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

Thanks for your sympathy and support.

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StillTrying2AgeGracefully's avatar

Fingers crossed that our children/grandchildren flourish together.

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Virma's avatar

Zuri, you are clearly a woman of intelligence and conviction, working to make the world a better place. Everyone should have the right to speak their truth and be listened to.

I’m very sorry the women you worked with had bought into the assumption of their superiority: it’s an unfortunately common delusion, and ludicrous to think they would spend money to hire a qualified person and then ignore anything that challenged their assumptions!

I was relieved to read that you decided to walk away from such a toxic situation, where you were hired for your expertise and then treated like an inferior. Please feel justified in getting out of there and living life on your own terms! It can get lonely at times but I hope and believe you will be happier. Good luck to you.

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

Thank you so much for your kind response which makes me feel so much better. Everything you have said is right, but sometimes the reptilian brain triggers periods of fear and anxiety in periods of uncertainty. In my rational brain, I know I made the right decision. Thank again for taking the time to write to me.

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Virma's avatar

❤️

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Sarah Joy's avatar

I think that’s a really hard thing to do, to draw a line in the sand and decide I’m not allowing anything past that doesn’t align with me, it’s hard with friends, with family. But so much more difficult when it’s professional and tied to income and even harder when the work aligns but the people are shit. So super congrats to you for choosing yourself, your dignity and your happiness. I feel like when we do things like this, the Universe responds with blessings. May they be plentiful and swift.

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

Thank you so incredibly much. My life’s purpose is to be at the service of others. I hope I’ll soon find something that lets me do that once more.

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Sarah Joy's avatar

You absolutely will!!

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Janice Airhart's avatar

I'm sorry you were made to feel that way; it was wrong. You deserve your dignity, though. I sincerely hope you find employment that values who you are.

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

Thank you for your kind words and wishes.

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Demian Elainé Yumei's avatar

“But the reality is, if I stayed, I would have been crushed, I would have become a version of me that isn't the authentic me, so I choose dignity.”

A decision that must be made sooner or later by all people in abusive situations, where the choice comes down to two things—Are you going to be the genuine you or the shadow of you?

So glad you chose the genuine you! ❤️🎶

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

Thank you so much. In my genuine self I feel at home - confident and powerful. I’m glad I’m back.

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BlackExpat25's avatar

Oh honey! I saw that headline and asked. Now why did I just say essentially the same thing. Ain’t nobody caring about your little funky job when the whole country is burning down around us. Please fire me and stop me from having to resign.

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

I believe in karma and they will get their due.

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Theano's avatar

I'm so sorry you've had to deal with yet more white person bullshit. I sincerely hope you find work wherein you experience being appreciated as you deserve. Much love

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

Thanks so much. Your kind words and constant support mean so much to me.

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Linda S.'s avatar

You did the right thing! Refusing a client's project or leaving a project mid-stream are difficult choices in the short term, but always right in the long term.

I ran my own consulting business for 24 years, and I can tell you that the one freedom I exercised was being selective about the the clients and projects I took on. There were a few, when either during or after the project was complete, I designated the clients as "NFW" on their file, meaning "No Future Work/No F**king Way." Did I worry about the money and being down a client? Yes. Was it hard? Sometimes. Did I ever regret the decision? Never.

What's the point of being your own boss if you don't choose the people and work that will further your growth and bank account.

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

Good advice, Linda. I’m definitely starting my NFW file right now.

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Janie Starr's avatar

This is brilliant and brave! Sharing it widely now!

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

Thank you.

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Alicia's avatar

I'm so sorry and I'm sending you hugs. That kind of behavior is disrespectful and so mean spirited I want to scream at all of those bitch heifers that they should know better! I'm glad you stood up for yourself and your knowledge and expertise. What you did was courageous and authentic and you definitely modeled what any of us would want the next generation to see: integrity. That's so sorely lacking in today's America that I think most don't even realize they lack it. And yet, it's everything and without it, a person is just another carbon copy of complacency and mediocrity. Brava, Ms. Stevens.

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

Thank you for your kind words which have helped me feel a whole lot better.

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Alicia's avatar

I'm glad.

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Leslye Joy Allen, Historian's avatar

Good for you. And that Black fleecing is true.

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

It absolutely is. You can borrow the term whenever you want.

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Solemna's avatar

This sucks. Cliché as it sounds, I hope that your courageous choice to walk away opens the door immediately for employment that deserves you.

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

Thank you for your well wishes. I very much appreciate them.

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Claire Davis's avatar

“Come for me, I don’t care” is a statement brimming with integrity and defiant self-respect. I love it. You are deserving of a workplace that will recognize and honor you for the expertise, passion, and skill that you bring to the position and that will take your input seriously and gratefully. I am confident such a workplace exists out there and that you will find it because you know what you’re looking for and won’t settle for anything less! Excellent article, as always, and leaving that workplace with the insufferable white women clientele behind seems like it was a decision aligned with your values and that put your well-being and integrity first. Wishing you all the best moving forward and onward to better things!! 🩵🪻🌈

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

Thank you for your beautiful and kind words, they mean the world.

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Claire Davis's avatar

🥰❤️

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Tara Dublin's avatar

If I could I would stand next to you every single day and scream COME FOR ME I DON’T CARE

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Zuri Stevens's avatar

You’re so amazing, thanks so much.

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